Masked
by CrashedmyHarley
Summary: Kouji's relationship with his dad isn't the best. His band is releasing a new album, and everything he's kept bottled up inside is coming out. And there's only one person he wants to reveal it to. Not what you think. Believe me .
1. Masked

I've had this idea for a while now... It's probably stupid and no one will like it, or it'll be a hit and I'll get tons of reviews . Oh well, here it goes...

Kouji: She has no self esteem...

Kouichi: That's easy to see.

Me: SHUT UP OR I'LL MAKE IT SO YOU BOTH DIE AT THE END!

Kouji: ...

Kouichi: You already killed Kouji...

Me: and I'd do it again too... only because I love him so .

Kouji: ACK! ABUSIVE PARTNER!

Me: -- I'll go on with the one shot now...

Disclaimer even thou there's a general discalimer on the front page: Oh all the horrible little dark situations that would take place if I owned Digimon and all the corrupted characters that would enter... Good thing my terrifying little mind didn't create Digimon, huh? I also don't own the song, Perfect by Simple Plan that Kouji will sing. .

**MASKED**

He doesn't care... He really doesn't. He wants me to be this 'perfect son', if there IS such a thing. He wishes I was smarter, like Kouichi who is in Honors Calc. Thanks to him, I can't even divide. I'm lucky Zac taught me how to multiply. Dad forgot he had a son up until I was six. He came home one day during lunch, saw me and realized, 'Oh yeah, I created that thing on the couch' then he asked me why I wasn't in school. Hello, wake up call for Mr. Minamoto, YOU NEVER SENT ME THERE! As if that weren't bad enough, we never stayed at one place more than a month... Did you know the schools are never in sync with eachother? They aren't... I'd finally remember the order of operations, then we'd move and they were talking about inequalities at school...

I may be a better athlete than Kouichi, but neither of us have very strong bones. We're both pretty clumsy, even though we CAN muster up some strength when needed. So I'm not smart, athletic, or coordinated... all I have is music... and guess what, Dad hates that. The only reason he pays attention to me now is because I'm constantly in the news paper as 'The Youngest Member of Masked'. And here I am, preparing to record the last song for our new album, ID Please.

After this, life is going to be a living hell if it wasn't already. Before, we always wore masks to hide our identity, and we never used names. Thus our band name being Masked. This new album had a ton of solos on it. We are revealing our 'deepest thoughts' as Tohru, our band leader,described it.

"Hey, chin up Kou," Zac called, pulling me out of my dazed state. His hand was placed on my shoulder to comfort me, my nervousness obviously showing through. "It's not gonna be that bad."

I sighed. "I guess..."

"Nerves ain't gonna get you, are they?" I shrugged. I'm not sure it's entirley nerves that's making me feel so sick. Zac started to rub my shoulders, trying to loosen me up I suppose. "You'll be fine... now go in there and sing your song." With that, he pulled me off the couch I was sitting on and pushed me into the recording room. Through the large glass window, he gave me a thumbs up.

Zac's the closest thing to a real father that I have. He's 23 and he's probably the most drunk sober guy you'll ever meet. He's wacky and he drives without a licsens, but hey, he cares... He taught me how to ride a bike when I was 10. He plays catch with me when he's not too drunk to stand, and he helps me with my home work, all the things a father should do. But most of all, he's proud of me.

I have 2 solos on this album. One is a thank you to Zac for helping me through all this, and this one, the one I'm about to record is to my father. It explains pretty much everything I've been feeling.

Suddenly, that sickening feeling in my stomach recieves a name, guilt. I feel guilty! I'm about to confess to the world that my father sucks as a parent, and Zac has done more for me than anyone else in the entire world! My father, a business tycoon cannot compare to Zac, a drunken American who doesn't have a penny to his name... I wanted to puke. Suddenly, almost on an impulse, I heaved. Right then and there, on the studio floor, I released everything in my stomach.

Zac rushed over to me, rubbing my back in circles.

"Whoa kiddo, ok... try to breath, calm yourself..." he whispered gently. One I was done retching, he carried me out of there and allowed me to lie down on the couch. "Namiki, can you grab some ginger ale and a damp cloth?" he asked the only female member of our group.

"Yeah, hold on." She returned quickly, handing the ginger ale to Zac and placing the damp cloth on my forehead. "You ok Kouji-san?" she asked me.

"I think so," I replied.

"Well, even so, I want you to lie down for a bit. Try to drink some of this, it will settle your stomach," said Zac. I obeyed him, drinking as much of the fluid as I could. At some point, I fell asleep, and when I woke up, I was in my own bed, at my house, with my father.

Satomi, my step mother, walked in, carrying a damp cloth when she saw I was awake.

"Oh, Kouji, are you feeling better?" she asked sweetly.

"Yeah, I guess," I answered.

"That's good. Are you hungry?"

"A little."

"Well," she said as she took the cloth that had fallen off my forehead when I woke, "Dinner's ready." That meant dad wanted to see me, damn. The only time I was ever informed of dinner being ready was when dad wanted me down there so he could talk to me. Refusing wouldn't be a good choice. I slowly rose from the bed and began my walk to the end of the hallway. I may have to go sit at the same table with him, but I don't have to do it quickly.

Once I reached the bottom of the stairs, dad motioned for me to sit next to him. Damn times two. I try not to make a habit of cursing, Zac says it won't do me any good, and there are much more interesting words I could use to get my point across, but it's times like these that make me really have no other choice.

I took my place next to him and he handed me a plate with some food on it. I placed it down on the table and nibbled on some of it before he spoke.

"That Zac brought you home," he said. "Aparrently you vomitted in the recording room. No doubt because of drinking."

"I don't drink dad," I corrected him.

"You hang around that drunk too much, he's a bad influence on you." yeah, like HE would know what's bad for me, please.

"I like him."

"Why, because you know you're ging to turn out just like him?"

"Would that be such a bad thing?" My father slammed his fist down on the table, making the plates and glasses jump.

"OF COURSE IT WOULD BEA BAD THING!" he yelled, clearly out raged.

"Why?" I asked calmly, staring at my feet.

"WHY? He's going NO WHERE Kouji NO. WHERE. YOU SHOULD BE AN ACCOUNTANT!"

"Why?" I asked again.

"Because accounting will take you some where! Do you really want to end up with nothing? No son of mine is going to be living on the streets!"

"Since when do you see me as a son?" I mumbled. I suppose my mubling was clear enough for him to hear as he slapped me quite hard.

"DON'T YOU EVER TALK TO ME THAT WAY!"

"WHY SHOULDN'T I?" I yelled back, finally angred enough. I don't allow anyone to hit me and get away with it, even if it IS my own father. "YOU TALK TO _ME_ THAT WAY ALL THE TIME!"

"YOU ARE MY SON! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SPEAK TO ME WITH SUCH DISRESPECT!"

"You have to earn respect to be treatred with it," I said coldly. "I will never respect you." And with that I ran out of the house. At first, I wasn't sure where I was going, but I ended up at the studio. I walked into the recording room, and started the machines. Lucky for me, no one was there, seeing as it was well past 10 by this time. I never realized how far a run the studio was from my house. I grabbed a spare acustic guitar and walked into the large room, placing the head phones on my head.

My fingers ran over the strings for a brief moment as I fingered the first chord. As I started to strum, the words just spilled from my mouth.

_"Hey, dad, look at me. Think back and talk to me. Did I grow up according to plan? And do you think I'm wasting my time doing this wanna do? But it hurts when you disapproved all along. And now I try hard to make it, I just wanna make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't pretend that I'm alright. And you can't change me, cause we lost it all. nothing lasts forever. I'm sorry, I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late, and we can't go back. I'm sorry I can't be perfect. I try not to think about the pain I feel inside. Did you know you used to be my hero? All the days you spent with me now seem so far away, and now it seems like you don't care anymore. And now I try hard to make it, I try hard to make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't stand another fight. And nothing's alright, cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever. I'm sorry, I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late, and we can't go back i'm sorry I can't be perfect. Nothing's gonna change the things that you said and nothings gonna make this right again. Please don't turn your back, I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you, but you don't understand. Cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect."_

As I finished the song, i walked out of the room and turned off the recording. I'd let the technictions deal with the buffering and all that crap. I walked out of the recording room without feeling the least bit sick. Even my conscious believed this was a nessisary evil.

Once I got back outside, I realized that it had started raining. It matched the way I was feeling inside. Funny how weather does that. It's like nature can sense when you're feeling upset.

I walked around in the dark, the raining pouring down on my head. I thought I heard thunder a few times, and I may have seen lightening but I wasn't really paying much attention. The end of my walkbrought me to a bar. I just stood outside the door, my legs spread apart, my head hanging low, my hair falling out of its pony tail. I looked up without moving my head. I don't remember what Iwas staring at, or if I was doing anything as I stared, like glaring or, god forbid, crying. I only clearly remember someone gently picking me up and carrying me into their warm, dry car. And I remember being slapped pretty hard.

"ARE YOU CRAZY?" Zac yelled at me. "I was worried sick! your father called me, yes, _called ME_ and told me you ran off." Despite the fact that I had just been slapped for the second time tonight and that I was freezing and cold, I grabbed onto Zac, burrying my face into his chest.

"I wanna go home..." I mumbled. He knew what I meant. The house my father lived in was not 'home'. Home was with Zac. I felt him nod as he pulled away from me and buckled my seat belt. As we drove through the rain, I felt the side of my check.

Zac's never gotten mad at me before. I guess he was pissed because I went out in the rain. Right now, I really didn't care though. At least he had just slapped me. Had I gone back to my father, I might have been beaten. Scratch that, would have definitetly been beaten. Dad hates me, that's pretty obvious.

"Call your brother when we get there, ok?" Zac's voice came suddenly.

"Ok..." I said quietly. Zac stopped the car. He placed his hand on my injured cheek, running his thumb over it slightly.

"Hey, sorry about that kiddo..." he said. "You just really worried me. Why did you go out in the rain like that?"

"I didn't want to go back..."

"Why didn't you just come over in the first place?" A smirk suddenly appeared on my face.

"I'll show you... go back to the studio." I wanted him to know that he WAS a better parent than my father. I've never told anyone what I've said here. And only a few people heard the solo about Zac, but no one's heard the one about my father. I'm finally going to come clean. I guess that's what Tohru wanted this album to do. We're taking off the mask.

* * *

Soooooooooooooo... how'd I do? Was it good, bad, or just not worthing voting? Well, review please. SERIOUSLY! REVIEW! 


	2. Masked, The Sequel

Yo Yo Yo! KJ in the hizzhouse! OK, out of my eight reviews, 3 ppl asked me to write a sequel. So, here it is! Also, if n e of you have a myspace account, message me! Just add crashedintodooragain at the end of the myspace address. Double also, visit my webbeh. It's my homepage on my profile. It may take a few moments to load, or it may come up all zappy like depending on your computer speed. And fill out the guest book form! And check the updates. OK, with all that said, here's the sequel. BTW, heart-wretching ending. I think so n e way. It should make you smile.

**Masked: The Sequel**

Well, the media's been bugging us for a sneak preview, or an interview of the new album. Like hell that's gonna happen. If everyone's gonna know about me and my 'secret life' I want it to be prolonged. Say hello to torturous fangirls. Zac says it'll be fine and the whole thing will blow over if I just act the same as I always did. Of course I'll act the same, only problem is my classmates won't. I just happened to have been transferred in the middle of a city that's obsessed with Masked. The girl who sits next to me claims to be related to the youngest, me. I suspect she'll be shunned after the release.

We're releasing the album at this brand new music store in Tokyo. The plan is to walk in with our masks on, play one of our old songs, then play the first song on the new album, and as soon as our solo parts come up, we take off the mask. Wonderous. I'm thinking about wearing a mask under my normal one. Something like Phantom of the Opera.

Right now I'm sitting at my computer, trying to write my contribution to the album. Meaning my age, height, full name, nickname, interests, hobbies, yada yada yada. Tohru, the leader of our band I guess, wants me to write down my 'type'. He wants to start a new craz. "Tell them you like girls with traffic cone orange hair!" he told me. "See how many girls do it!"

"And if I don't like girls?" I asked him just to make him pissed.

"Tell them you like flat chests and dildos."

That conversation ended pretty quickly.

So, as I was saying, I'm writing down my contribution:

Full Name: Kouji Minamoto

Nickname: Kouji, nothing else, call me anything else and your head is mine.

Age: 16 perfect huh?

Height: 5'8" pretty tall I guess, but I know people who are taller.

Interests: ... isn't it obvious? Music.

Hobbies: Here's the bonus question! you get to breathe if you get it right.

Answer is: SINGING! Yay, you get it right, if you didn't get it right go die now.

Girl type: Tohru wants this here. I don't. And I've decided that I'm not telling you a damn thing. Sorry, you'll have to get over it.

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I think Tohru will appreciate that one. I swiftly clicked send before I could think of how rude that was.

I've been searching new schools I could transfer to. I'm thinking somewhere in Africa. Nice, warm place. I could finally get a tan. And there wouldn't be any fan girls there! When I mentioned that to Kouichi he smacked me in the head and told me I'd get sunburn before I ever tanned. He's probably right.

I think the worst thing about the new album is that one song I recorded... Dad's going to hear it at some point, there's no getting around it. I don't want to be there when he's calm enough to hear the words. He won't be calm for that much longer, I can say that much. Knowing this current impending doom, Kouichi has been trying to allow me to move in with he and mom. Or Zac. Neither of them will kill me for that song. Infact, I think they'd love the song that was about them. I was about to pick up my guitar and play it when-

"KOUJI! Get off that DAMN computer and go to bed!"- cut off my train of thought. I knew I better do it. I think he was drunk.

Just two more days until hell has risen. Joy to the world for the media, the king is dead for me.

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"Cheer up Kou," Tohru said as he patted my back. "The world is about to _worship_ you." He looked up to the sky, putting his hands together and shaking them. Freak was worshiping to god to be worshiped on earth... why does that seem messed up to me? I just shook my head and walked away. I brought an extra mask just incase I actually did the double mask idea. It was beginning to look better and better. I reached for the mask when someone tapped me on the shoulder.

"Hey there little man, what's that you got there?" Zac asked me. I sighed. Damn, he won't let me do it.

"A mask," I answered quietly.

"That's not the one we decided we'd use. What're you planning?" He raised a blonde eye brow.

"Nothing anymore..." I placed the mask back into my bag, then started to walk away.

"You were gonna wear two, weren't you?"

"Maybe."

"Aw, Kou-"

"Don't worry, I'm not doing it anymore," I interrupted him.

"Do it."

"What?" I hadn't heard him right. "What?"

"Do it. You'll eventually have to take that one off too, but I think it'd be funny. I can hear the media now. 'The youngest member is about to take his mask off as well. I am prepared to hear some fan girls shriek. And OH! There's another mask under that one! You can hear the disappointment in the groans here folks.' I think it'd be funny."

I shrugged. "OK, I'll do it, but Tohru isn't allowed to kill me since you told me to."

"Ha, no problem, I can take whimpy Tohru." He ruffled my hair a bit as he walked away, laughing. I figured he was drunk again.

"Hey, Masked, you guys ready?" the store manager asked us. Namine gave him a thumbs up.

"Any time manager dude," she said in her high pitched voice. She grabbed her butterfly mask and placed on her face, pulled her hair out of the straps. Tohru grabbed an orange tiger mask and placed it on as well. Zac grabbed his monkey and I grabbed my Phantom of the Opera mask, as well as a blue wolf. "Alright guys, I'm about to introduce you."

We plugged our instruments in. I checked my blue electric guitar's string, making sure they were fastened correctly and that it was in tune. I remember the last time I didn't check... I still have the scar from when I tripped over the amp when the string snapping scared me. That's how I got one of my nicknames, "The Graceful Ninja". Don't ask about the ninja part.

I took in a deep breath, waiting for the screams of the fan girls. They came... very loudly they came.

"And now I am pleased to introduce, MASKED!!!" yelled the manager. I looked up at the crowd and put on my fake smile... which quickly disappeared when I saw someone glaring at- er, NOT glaring at me... sorry, I was so use to saying this person was always glaring at me that it's kind of a habit. But the fact that he WASN'T glaring at me caught me off guard... He was smiling... and nodding... like he was... proud? Nah, he probably had gas or something. That bastard was probably drunk again, so drunk he actually thought he WANTED to come see me. He never cared. Thinking about all this got me pumped enough to put that smile on for real. When my song comes up, I'll sing it loud and fucking proud.

We played two songs before mine. Tohru's and Namine's maskes were now off. My turn. Tohru walked up to the mic and said gleefully, "Now whom I'm sure you've all been waiting for, our youngest member!" I pointed at me, then motioned for me to come up. as he handed me the mic, I threw my mask off, ready to tell the world how much of an ass my 'father' was, if you could call him that.

"Hey guys! My name's Kouji Minamoto, and I'm ready to play my heart out!" I smirked.

_"Hey, dad, look at me. Think back and talk to me. Did I grow up according to plan?" _I was staring at him in the crowd, wondering if, in all of his drunk mind, he could understand this was about him. I figured he did since he was frowning._ "And do you think I'm wasting my time doing this wanna do? But it hurts when you disapproved all along." _His frown got worse, almost as if he wanted to cry or something. I kind of felt bad, but he's put me throught some major shit, so it's all coming out._ "And now I try hard to make it, I just wanna make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't pretend that I'm alright. And you can't change me, cause we lost it all. nothing lasts forever. I'm sorry, I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late, and we can't go back. I'm sorry I can't be perfect." _He looked away, ashamed probably, that his son would speak such 'disrespect' against his father. He can bite me for all I care._ "I try not to think about the pain I feel inside. Did you know you used to be my hero?"_ Ooh, I hit something there. He visibly cringed._ "All the days you spent with me now seem so far away, and now it seems like you don't care anymore. And now I try hard to make it, I try hard to make you proud. I'm never gonna be good enough for you. I can't stand another fight. And nothing's alright, cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever. I'm sorry, I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late, and we can't go back i'm sorry I can't be perfect."_ He was shaking his head. I bet he was wondering what his excuse would be at the office. He's always telling his coworkers how great his home life is. What bull shit._ "Nothing's gonna change the things that you said and nothings gonna make this right again. Please don't turn your back, I can't believe it's hard just to talk to you, but you don't understand. Cause we lost it all, nothing lasts forever I'm sorry I can't be perfect." _I think he was crying. Most of the crowd was. I just smirked. Take that you horrible excuse for a father. It's all shoved in your face. No, slapped in your face. Of course, when I got home I knew there would be hell to pay. Whatever, for now I have a victory.

"And now I'd like to introduce our last member, and the man who's been like a father to me since I joined the band!" Everyone clapped louldy. After the song I just sang I thought that last bit would be appropriate. When Zac walked up to the mic, he hugged me tightly, kissing my head.

"Proud of ya kid," he told me. "Great job." And with a final squeeze he let go of me so he could preform his solo.

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I wanted to go home with Zac, but he told me I should talk to my dad, my REAL dad. I told him to have an ambulance ready. When I walked in, dad was sitting on the couch, looking rather pissed. I wondered if I should grab some pain killers before he started.

"Kouji?" he asked when I walked in.

"Yeah?"

"Come sit," he said, patting the couch.

"I'd rather not."

"Why?" he asked, looking up at me now. "Do you hate me that much?"

"Not hate..." I murmered.

"Fear?"

I nodded slowly.

"Kouji, I'm not going to hurt you." I scoffed at his comment. Yeah right, like I haven't heard that before. "You don't have to sit, you can stay over there. I just want to talk to you about that song today..."

"Well, I don't," I said quickly.

He was confused now. "Why?"

"I think the song is self explanitory."

"Hmm," he said, looking at the ground again. "So you meant everything you said in it?"

"Yes."

"Then..." His voice was getting louder. Here come the punches. "Then, go... Go live with Zac..."

"EH?!" I almost fell over. "What?"

"You have every right to be afraid of me, I've hurt you... and Zac WOULD be a better father, he has patience I don't... and you respect him so... go live with Zac."

I couldn't believe he was kicking me out. Then again, I guess I could. He must really hate me right now, as if he didn't before. What ever, Zac likes me any way.

"Fine," I said. "I'll go pack, I'll be out of here tonight." As I moved for the stairs, dad got up, walking over to me. I jumped, running to the other side of the room. I knew it was too easy.

"You... you don't have to go just yet..." he said, his words sounding pained. "I still want to finish talking to you."

"W-what else is there to say?" I asked, hiding underneath the desk in the hall. I let him know I was scared, maybe he would be easy on me if he knew I was.

"Everything. Kouji, I've always cared about you. Always. I just- I didn't want you to fail son! I seemed to be doing everything wrong and then I couldn't take it! I started drinking and... oh I am so sorry!" He dropped to his knees, crying like a toddler who just lost his favorite power ranger action figure. "God! I am so sorry!" He was pounding the ground, wailing as loudly as he could. I was so glad he wasn't pounding on me. But, it was weird to see him this way, frightening.

After a while of him sobbing, he looked up at me with his red rimmed eyes.

"I love you son," he said. He sounded sincere... Really sincere... "That's why I want you to live with Zac, he'll never hurt you the way I did." And he was crying again. Man this was pathetic. A grown man should never cry, yet here was my dad, crying like a baby.

I climbed out from under the desk, sure that he wasn't going to turn on me. "Dad?" I said. He looked up at me again with tears streaming down his face. "That's all you had to say."

It was so quick that I almost wasn't sure what had happened. Dad was holding me, rocking me... rubbing the back of my head. I felt good. Nothing will ever change what he said, what he did to me... but maybe we can fix the damage... Right now, I think that's what I really needed.


	3. Forever

I thought it would be interesting if I put the song that was dedicated to Zac and Tomoko. It's the bonus song from Good Charolette's Debute Album (It's the one with Little Things on it incase you didn't know.)

**Forever**

Always

Always and forever.

All, Always

Always and forever

Sitting here and thinking back

To a time when I was young

My memories

Clear as day

I'm listening to the dishes clank

You were downstairs

You would say

Sounds great

And all the times we laughed at you

And all the times when you stayed true to us

Now we'll say

Say I thank you

I'll always thank you

More than you could know

Than I could ever show

And I love you

I'll always love you

There's nothing I won't do to say these words to you

That you're beautiful forever

Always

Always and forever.

You were my mom

You were my dad

The only thing I ever had was you

It's true

Even when the times got hard

You were there to let us know

That we'll get through

You showed me how to be a man

You taught me how to understand the things

That people do

You showed me how to love my God

You taught me that not everyone

Knows the truth

And I thank you

I'll always thank you

More than you could know

Than I could ever show

And I love you

I'll always love you

There's nothing I won't do to say these words to you

That you will live forever

Forever and ever

Forever and ever

Said I thank you

I'll always thank you

More than you could know

Than I could ever show

And I love you

I'll always love you

There's nothing I won't do to say these words to you

That I'll thank you

Will always thank you

Mor than you would know

Than I could ever show

And I love you

I'll always love you

There's nothing I won't do to say these words to you

That you will live forever


End file.
